December 9, 2002 - Chapel Address

The Paradox of Law and Grace 

    or Why It's a Good Idea Always to 
         Wear Your Seatbelt!

Before I go any farther however, I hope you won’t mind if I say just a word about this little joke we share about my obsession with character and paradox.  Let’s just say hypothetically of course, that someone actually asked you next month, or say on April 1, 2020 what you remember about chapel at Greenville College, and particularly about what that president….”What was his name?”….talked about.  You might actually remember “character and paradox;” but forget what it had to do with anything.  So to save you AND me some embarrassment, let me offer this answer.  You could say something like this: “Well, this guy always said that character was crucial because God cares at least as much about who you become inside as He cares about what you’re doing on the outside. Who we are inside, where no one else can see, is our character; made up of many virtues and vices.  And he made a big fuss about paradox because a good  liberal arts education teaches that there are many sides to most issues, that are often apparently contradictory, but usually each with an element of truth that deserves our attention and even embrace”  

There’s a special reason however for picking these two particular virtues today.  I pick discipline because it’s exam time and for most of you, that is the virtue in which most of you stand in the greatest need these coming days.  And I pick grace because the Christmas season is above all, a season about God’s amazing grace in sending His only Son to earth on our behalf.  He did it “while we were yet sinners” and deserved only judgment and eternal condemnation.  It is thus, the season of discipline and grace.  Since discipline usually means following a set of rules or laws, you could say that my comments today are about the paradox of law and grace; or as a subtitle, “Why It’s a Good Idea to Wear Your Seatbelts.”

Prayer: May the words of my mouth and the meditations of our hearts be acceptable in thy sight, oh Lord, our strength and our redeemer.

A. Discipline
I hate it when anyone tells me what to do!  Maybe it’s genetic; being Sicilian.  Even my mom tells a story..and I can’t vouch for it…that one day in church at age four, while she was playing the organ and couldn’t discipline me, I was stomping up and down the front pew in hard shoes, distracting everyone else.  When she returned to her seat and made me sit down, I said, “Well I may be sitting down on the outside but I’m still standing up on the inside!” Or maybe my attitude comes as a holdover from  college years during the late sixties.  We used to see a lot of bumper stickers saying, “Challenge Authority” and though I was hardly a pot smoking, rebellious hippie, I was a long-haired independent thinker and figured I could “do it my way.”  The way to deal with “Monday Monday” was to take the “Bridge Over Troubled Waters,” and “All You Needed Is Love.” When I began to study philosophy, I realized that I placed a high value on “freedom” even though I also kept a high regard for authority. I was and still am inclined to libertarian philosophy and arminian theology. I still don’t like being told what to do; Ellen will confirm the surest way to get me to turn right when we’re lost is to TELL me I MUST go left!  And I confess the Vice-Presidents here know it’s not a good idea to tell me there is only one way to do something. 

According to Stephen Carter, an African-American professor of law at Yale who is very interested in character, we are all “bundles of needs and desires” and we live in a culture that knows nothing about delayed gratification.  We want everything our way NOW! Pizza, car rentals, telephone service, instant messaging, exam results, food refills in the DC, sexual gratification, even college degrees and high paying jobs.  We are a culture of instant, NOT delayed gratification.  But discipline tells us what to do and flies in the face of instant gratification. 

Consider for example three different kinds of disciplines (or laws or rules.)  First I even hate laws, rules, or restraints I impose on myself.  After 27 years, I still hate the fact I’ve told myself I’ll get up earlier three days a week to exercise.  I’m trying to drink more water…and I hate it. Saturday I wanted to go look at new cars, but told myself that first I had to work on what I was going to say to you today.  In short, I hate laws, rules, or disciplines, that force me to do what I don’t really feel like doing….even if I’m the one making the rules.  And I know many of you feel the same way.  This week I was talking with a male student friend about the sexual pressures that arise because young people are ready for sexual activity sometimes by age 12 or 13, but college culture, discourages marriage until 22-23 or for grad students sometimes even until 26-27.  So for Christian young people who believe sexual intercourse should be reserved for marriage, there is this terrible period of 10 to 15 years of incredible stress.  The demands on self-restraint are excruciating; in a culture of self-indulgent UNrestraint. 

But then there are disciplines imposed from outside too.  As part of living with others we agree to disciplines, that we might not choose to impose on ourselves otherwise. We submit to speed limits, stop signs, income taxes, exam schedules, keeping appointments, term paper deadlines, rules about not drinking alcohol or visiting rooms of persons of the opposite sex at certain hours.  We agree to submit but we don’t like these disciplines either!  They are not self-gratifying; they are hard, and we sometimes wonder why we allow these disciplines into our lives.  

Then finally, there are disciplines that come for Christians because we submit to the Word of God.  These now carry not just the weight of our self-discipline, or even just the community consensus, but the force of God’s own expectations for His children.  At Greenville College, we believe He calls us to the disciplines of putting others first, peacemaking, self-sacrifice, kindness, honesty, refraining from gossip, from a spirit of criticism, from sexual intercourse outside marriage, and from homosexual behavior of any kind. These disciplines too are usually not self-gratifying and likewise require great self-restraint.  When, for example, others around us enter into criticism…whether justified or not…it is easy to join in and allow it to become destructive of others and especially our own character. 

So what’s the point?  Well as you know, these forms of self-restraint promote the growth of the character virtue of discipline.  And practice is the key.  The more we learn to delay gratification in important parts of our lives, the easier it becomes.  By this practice, we will have grown the character virtue of discipline.  Aristotle said the growth of character is all about forming habits.  Oswald Chambers says character formation is all about how we handle the drudgery of life. You know, the hard stuff during exam times!  Quoting 2 Peter 1:4-5, Chambers says it is all about “adding character to faith.”  

“Drudgery is one of the finest tests to determine the genuineness of our character. Drudgery is work that is far removed from anything we think of as ideal work. It is the utterly hard, menial, tiresome, and dirty work. And when we experience it, our spirituality is instantly tested and we will know whether or not we are spiritually genuine.” 
“No one is born either naturally or supernaturally with character; it must be developed. Nor are we born with habits—we have to form godly habits on the basis of the new life God has placed within us. …Drudgery is the test of genuine character. The greatest hindrance in our spiritual life is that we will only look for big things to do……………I must realize that my obedience even in the smallest detail of life has all of the omnipotent power of the grace of God behind it. .”

You might suppose discipline is good because of what it helps you accomplish.  While that’s partly true, the most important point is that to be a disciplined person is a virtue in and of itself.  I believe discipline is virtue because of what it shows about who you are inside.
So whether in matters of your citizenship, your studies, your sexuality, or your spiritual growth, discipline is a virtue of character.

B. Grace
That brings me to the second virtue I want to talk about today; grace.  The virtue of grace makes allowances for others; especially when they don’t deserve any allowances.  It is “unmerited favor.” It’s returning road rage with kindness. It’s being civil even with phone solicitors and other annoying people….for YOUR sake as much as for theirs!  It’s telling the truth about others even when they lie about you.

When our character embodies grace we do not keep accounts of who owes whom what.  Grace is no a particular position or opinion.  It is a quality of attitude, of heart.  This virtue of grace shows itself by the spirit with which we relate to others.  Do we think more highly of others than ourselves?  Do we consider that someone else’s opinion may be worth hearing, not just because it’s the polite thing to do, or even because it’s the best way to force them to hear ours, but because we recognize their value, and do not need to control or win at every turn? 

Gracious people are wonderful to be around.  They make space for others.  They are not however, merely people pleasers. They typically can let attention focus on someone else not because they are uninteresting or shallow themselves, but on the on the contrary because they have enough self-assurance not to need to dominate or control.  When you’ve spent time with gracious people you come away feeling you are the most important person in the world.

Sometimes grace however is confused with mere tolerance.  Some people simply don’t care what others do or say.  This is not grace but just indiscriminate permissiveness; “anything goes.”  Some even feign graciousness posing behind a façade of pseudo-sophistication that is deeply arrogant and judgmental.  Gracious people have firm convictions, and deep passions.  But they hold their views with an open-handed humility that is not easily threatened and seeks improvement.  

God was gracious in sending Christ; to sacrifice his own life for ungrateful, arrogant creatures.  Christ was gracious in seeing the best in each of us, and especially in his weak disciples.  His grace allowed…and allows…Him to see through the false pretenses of our weaknesses, our insecurities, and perhaps especially our own self-deceptions. If we do not believe others need grace in dealing with us, then we obviously have not seen ourselves very well.  He rises above it all but never with judgment that demeans or belittles.  We come from encounters with Christ feeling like the most important person in the world.  

Summary
So what does the virtue of grace….captured in the spirit of Christmas have to do with the virtue of discipline?  They seem worlds apart; almost contradictory.  Discipline seems to be all about following rules, those of the community, or the state, or even ones we set for ourselves.  But isn’t that all really “Old Testament” stuff?  Aren’t we today “New Testament” Christians, saved by grace and no longer under the law?  Shouldn’t we “go easy on ourselves,” “make room for everyone,” tolerate anything, avoid discrimination, include everyone?  What’s the point of attention to rules and law, of personal discipline, of self-restraint?  

A week ago last night, Ellen and I jumped in the car and headed into St. Louis as we have done dozens and dozens of times.  We were headed to dinner with a college trustee and her husband who have become good friends.  I remarked to Ellen as we pulled away from the stop sign by the “Simple Room” what a wonderful treat it was to have a job that let us travel together on a pleasant Sunday evening in a comfortable car enjoying one another’s company for a restful trip to spend the evening with good friends we love and respect deeply.  God was good.  Sixty seconds later, as I approached the second sweeping left turn headed for Interstate 70 on “Moo Cow Mountain Road,” I saw headlights from the other direction coming too fast and at the wrong angle.  Seconds later I remember the unforgettable sight of those two headlights 20 feet directly ahead, knowing there was nothing more I could do. The next instant, we plowed head-on into the oncoming car at a combined speed of perhaps more than 110 mph.  It was over that fast.  

I remember thinking, “That was quick!”  I remember wondering why the airbags had not deployed, then looking down in the darkness to see they had deployed.  I asked Ellen if she was all right, and heard her say, “I think so,” which relieved my heart.  I remember saying I need to get help, and looking for my cell phone.  It had fallen to the floor.  I remember hearing a terrible deathly moaning from the other car and a second voice crying out, “Someone please help me get out of here!”  As I opened the door while talking to the 911 operator, I saw the flames erupt from under my hood only a foot or so from my face, and said to Ellen, “We’ve got to get out Sweetheart, the car’s on fire.”  I do not remember releasing my seatbelt.  But I know it was attached…and Ellen’s too.  If we were less modest we could show you the black and blue marks to prove it.  Ellen’s x-rays can show the broken chest bone and several ribs to prove it.

Now I hate rules; especially laws that supposedly protect me from myself.  I don’t like the disciplines of self-restraint….including the discipline of seatbelt restraints.  After all, we didn’t have them when I was a kid.  As a five-year old I rode fearlessly standing on the seat with my arm around my dad’s shoulder as he drove for days on end. But pressure from my wife, from my daughter, from my sister, not to mention from the State of Illinois, has made the practice of seatbelt self-restraint a matter of habit.  Over time, this discipline of self-restraint has become, I suppose, a kind of virtue.  

That night, seven days ago reminded me that however paradoxical it may seem, the virtues of disciplined self-restraint and grace can be partners. I saw in that moment that self-discipline can be a means of grace; that Law can be a means of grace.  Our lives were spared.  We don’t know why, for we have long ago learned that while “to live is Christ, to die is gain.”  God apparently has more for Ellen and me to do in this world.  But we take His sparing our lives, as evidence of His grace.

Christ did not come to this world to ignore the law, or to casually and indiscriminately dismiss the expectations of the Father.  On the contrary, He took them with a deathly seriousness. If you are to be partakers of His grace, and become men and women of grace yourselves, I suggest that you begin by pursuing the virtue of discipline.  Form good habits of study, of sexual conduct, of associations, and of spiritual formation.  They will stand you in good stead as virtues for the season of examinations and the season of Christmas. 
 

Dr. Jim Mannoia

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Last updated: December 9, 2002