Courage

It is good as always to see you all back safely from the holidays.  I hope they were weeks of refreshment and renewal.  I know many of you have made some exciting trips (Ireland, Dominican, Czech Republic, Tex-Mex) and I wish it were possible to hear your stories and see your pictures.  These experiences are often life-changing.  

Over the past few weeks I have been thinking a lot about fear.  It seems that fear has entered the lives of many of those I love.  Let me tell you about a few examples.  First, my wife Ellen has developed a strong aversion…shall I call it fear…of traveling the Old National Trail road where we were nearly killed in our accident on December 1.  I suppose it’s a mild fear, but though I have driven it, she certainly has not traveled that road since. 

Then, over Christmas, my wife and daughter and I visited our son in Croatia where he is living and working this year as a consultant for the US government.  The story of our trip over reads like a bad dream with cancelled flights, delayed flights, rerouted flights, lost luggage, and so on.  Despite the fact my 23 year old daughter is an experienced world traveler, she burst into tears when enroute to Budapest we finally found one another over a paging system in Zurich where none of us had expected to be.  The pressures of intense law-school exams made the trauma of it all, and especially of catching her rearranged connection in JFK by only 60 seconds frightening.  

While there, we noted that the people in Croatia and Hungary smiled very little.  We joked about it, posing for deadpan pictures you can see on the web in what we called “eastern European style.” But personal recollections of how bullet holes got in the walls of their own homes and many downtown buildings remind them the Serbo-Croatian war is very recent history, and the fear lingers.  

My son felt fear at the end of our visit as we left him again, living alone to work in a difficult situation where he does not speak the language.  He also felt a different kind of fear the day before we left after he proposed marriage to his girlfriend who was along with us for the holidays.  It’s frightening to take such a step!  I remember the whole night after I proposed to Ellen, lying awake on the bed staring at the moon, saying over and over again, “My God what have I done?”  “My God what have I done?”  So like father like son, he too felt fear.  

My daughter also felt fear from the impact of his proposal.  She cried hard, feeling the fear that she was no longer the only daughter.  Perhaps that seems an odd fear, but for any who have felt their special niche in any close group threatened you know it is a very real fear, coupled with loneliness and the fear of growing up.  

My wife’s fears have been compounded only in the last few days this week, as she visited her ailing father in Peoria.  The doctor said he has “6 months” and no matter how you think you’ve prepared yourself, it is still a shock, and it is still frightening; especially when your mom died when you were 16 and this is the last parent.  

My mother has felt fear too.  Her failing memory gives her an odd objectless fear…fear of forgetting.  So because what’s forgotten is forgotten, her fear circles around on itself.  It is the lonely fear of old age.  

Some of you are seniors.  Would you raise your hand if you’re a senior?  This may be the last semester of your college education.  While it may seem impossible, it’s coming to an end.  It seemed to stretch out ahead of you forever when you starting getting those information brochures in high schools…. perhaps several each week even when you were a sophomore!  But now it’s coming, and the fears are legion.  What am I going to do?  Where am I going to work?  Will I get a job?  How can I live without my friends?  Am I really that grown up?  

I myself have certainly not been spared from fear either.  Since 15 years ago this month, there has been the fear of losing my wife.  And since our accident before Christmas there has been fear this hip won’t heal right and my life will be changed and limited.  As I have watched the economy continue to stumble last fall, and now tumble even since a good start on the new year, my fears for the college mount.  As a student in philosophy, I never imagined that stock market charts could make my stomach hurt.  With the crucial donations and enrollment applications for next fall behind the pace we believe we need, I feel fear.  And while may seem an odd thing to confess, even as I read some theology last week, I found myself frightened by the prospect it could be true, and if true, it called into question the faithfulness and reliability of God’s promises.  Doubts are frightening too; in fact they can prompt some of the deepest fears.  

I imagine my awareness of these fears all around me has been enhanced by some films I’ve seen. First were the ones from teaching COR 401.  (Let me digress to say it was a wonderful course, full of all the challenges, ambiguities, pressures, conflicts, and disagreeable exchanges that make real life real.)  We saw Bowling for Columbine, a powerful indictment claiming American culture is permeated by fear.  It’s not the guns, not the history, not the poverty, not the TV, not even Marilyn Manson that drives us to kill one another in numbers way out of proportion to our population.  Instead, it is said to be our fear!  The media feed it.  “If it bleeds, it leads.”  And the movie industry helps too.  With Ellen out of town, I found myself watching the Blair Witch Project on TV.  It’s all about fear.   And in case I have not given you enough evidence that fear is all around us, try just joking in airport security!  Or let me remind you the precarious worldwide nuclear “balance” is dangerously unstable in the Far East.  Finally, I could hardly overlook the fact that right now a quarter of million young American soldiers are wending their way eastward, leaving frightened families on piers and runways all around the country.  The soldiers themselves of course are frightened too, with the prospects of war in Iraq foremost in their minds.

So what is fear?  That probably sounds like a dumb question since everyone knows it when they feel it.  But let me try a working definition.  Fear is an emotion, an unpleasant emotion, that USUALLY accompanies anticipation of something painful that may happen.  The 3 key elements are that it is itself a bad feeling, that it occurs because we thinking about the future, and the future we imagine is painful.  In a nutshell, fear may be thought of as “pain that anticipates pain.”  

The results of fear are varied.  In the extreme it is literally deadly.  An excess of fear can shut down our physical bodies more quickly than most of us can imagine unless we have felt such terror.  In lesser forms it is distracting, upsetting, or even entirely paralyzing.  Fear can paralyze your ability to speak in crucial moments or to write an exam for which you have studied.  It can block other normal reactions too, causing you to respond with instinctual defensiveness rather than with gracious and open responses that might be more in character.  It can show itself in a range of behaviors from anger and violence to withdrawal, silence, and depression.  Some of these results of fear may have happened to you even already today!

As I have reflected these past weeks on the fear all around me, I have also reflected on how people respond.  The virtue of character most often mentioned as the antidote to fear is courage.  But then I have to ask, “What is courage?”  The other night, again in Ellen’s absence….she needs to be careful about leaving me alone too often don’t you think?….I found myself squinting to watch Rambo III on a squirrelly cable channel we don’t really get.  I wanted to watch it because it seemed to be about as opposite to the Blair Witch Project as I could imagine.  It was supposedly all about courage rather than fear.  Well, as an aside I confess I was amazed by the irony of glorifying Afghans who now since 9/11 have been made villains for turning against us the same weapons we gave them back then.   But watching the “Italian Stallion,” it didn’t take me long to figure out that Aristotle was right when he said, “He who exceeds in fearlessness….would be a sort of madman.”  You see Aristotle believed, “Courage is the mean with regard to the feelings of fear and confidence.”  To be too full of fear is to be a coward.  But to be too full of confidence is to be a fool.  For John Rambo to face Russian tanks and troops with only two guns was not an act of courage.  

Still the question remains, what then IS real courage?  Again let me try a working definition.  Courage is not just another emotion; an antidote emotion to fear.  Instead, courage is a quality of character that enables you to anticipate pain without the USUAL results, namely fear.  In the first place it is important to see this is an aspect of that notorious “character” you hear us talking about all the time here at GC.  It’s an aspect that makes it possible to respond in a different and more noble way under certain circumstances.  Unless your character contains courage you’ll respond in the usual way; fear.  But shaping your character with courage takes time, effort, and practice.  It takes conscious decisions to choose the mean between fear and confidence.  And it must be repeated habitually over and over to bend character to this shape.  Without that repetition, our character will respond in the USUAL way to anticipated pain; i.e. with fear.  

Second, courage comes into play only really when we already anticipate future pain.  You can’t really be courageous unless you are in a situation which looks like pain is likely.  Of course if you aren’t smart enough to see what’s likely coming, then you don’t anticipate pain, so you can’t be courageous.  But for the most part, in our world today, thanks to both reality and the virtual reality of the media, we typically have such good imaginations we often anticipate pain….even when it really is NOT likely.  This anticipation of pain, this fear, is pervasive, so the opportunities for courage are too! 

But third, let’s focus on what courage really produces.  I have said it allows us to anticipate pain without the USUAL results.  That usual result is fear.  So some would say it prevents the courageous person from even feeling the fear at all.  Aristotle takes this view and says the courageous person “stands his ground against things that are terrible, and delights in this, or at least is not pained.”  But if this be courage, I suspect there are not many brave souls among us because I think not feeling fear is really rare.   Others suggest that courage means feeling the fear, but not showing it.  Somehow it seems to me that this is not courage, but merely bravado, a close cousin but not really the same noble virtue at all.  So, finally, it seems to me, that perhaps since the usual result of anticipating pain is a fear that paralyzes us, it might be that real courage results not in avoiding fear, or masking fear, but in allowing us to feel it without paralysis.  In short, courage, lets us anticipate pain yet keep on going.  

When we get up in the morning frightened by the prospects of the day, as I think we all feel or have felt, it takes courage to get up anyway.  When we walk into the room for that exam we’ve labored to prepare, frightened by the prospects of failure, it takes courage to walk in anyway.  When we confess our love to another, frightened by the prospects of rejection, it takes courage to confess it anyway.  When we confront a friend with constructive criticism, frightened by the prospect of loneliness, it takes courage to confront anyway.  When we have to decide which job to take and where to move, frightened by the prospect of the unknown and unfamiliar, it takes courage to decide anyway.  When we walk out of the doctor’s office, frightened by the prospect of death, it takes courage to walk out and on anyway.  While some may disagree, I believe it’s not that we do not feel the fear, but rather than we go on in spite of it.  That is courage. 

Now I suppose I could stop right here.  Courage is going on in spite of fear.  But as I thought about talking to you about courage, as a follower of Jesus Christ, I had to ask, “What does Scripture say about courage?”  I admit I found the answer pretty surprising.  Of course the Old Testament is full of references to courage.  It most often refers to the courage required in war; as in the experience of God’s people as they considered entering the promised land at Zin. They were exhorted to “fear not but to be of good courage.”  (Num 13:20, Deut 1:21, 31:6)  It seems they too were often a nation of fear as we may be today.  In those instances where it does not refer to battle, it often exhorts leaders to hold firm to the law of God and to their resolve to reform God’s people.   Joshua is told as a leader, “Be strong and of good courage” so that the people of God will prosper.  And David challenging his son Solomon again urges him to “Be strong and of good courage” adding that Solomon should “fear not, be not dismayed, for the Lord God, even my God is with you.  He will not fail you or forsake you….” (I Chron 28:20).  And the prophet Azariah challenged King Asa to take courage as he undertook the destruction of idols throughout the land (II Chron 15:8).  Again when Ezra the priest was commanded to reform God’s people he was told to take courage and do it. (Ezra 10:4).  And finally, David ends several of his Psalms with the call to “Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he will strengthen thine heart..”  (Psalms 27:14, 31:24)

But when I combed the New Testament, at least in the King James Version, I found no use of the word ‘courage’ in the Gospels at all, and in fact it is used only once in the entire New Testament, in Acts 28:15, when Paul was traveling under guard to Rome and as he neared the city was greeted by Christians at the 3 Taverns on Via Appia where he took courage!  This absence of reference made me begin to wonder if courage is merely a humanistic construction, exalted especially among Greeks who wrote about it constantly.  Perhaps it is a counterfeit response to the anticipation of fear, an inappropriate response for followers of Christ.

So I began to look for references to fear instead, to see how God’s Word calls followers of Christ to respond.  Almost immediately I was drawn to I John, because as a young boy I remember going to the altar and recommitting my life to Christ time after time fearful that somehow I was not really “saved.”  I John is a book of reassurance, speaking directly to the problem of fear out of abundant references to God’s love.  John confirms as we already know, that fear has to do with pain (“punishment” 4:18) but then adding that “he who fears is not perfected in love.” (4:18) and repeats himself on this crucial matter saying, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out all fear.”  (4:18)  So it struck me that it’s not so much that the human Greek solution to fear in courage is wrong, but that God provides a deeper answer that tells us how to find that courage; it is found in love.  

How does this work.  I began to wonder what does love have to do with courage?  So I began to review those examples of fear I shared with you at the beginning.  What is it that gives courageous people courage? What gives them the strength to face those fears without paralysis?  Perhaps it really is love.  For the soldier it is the love of country, and maybe even love of family.  The same love may inspire the politician who chooses to take a courageous but unpopular stand.  For my son, facing the fears of marriage, it is the love of his fiancée Lyla.  With my daughter in tears on my shoulder fearing her anticipated “loss” of that special place in her brother’s eyes, and her special place in the family, it was the reminder of her love for her brother that gave her courage.  For me as I often struggle to face the fears of my work, it is the love of my family, the love for what Greenville College has done in the life of my father, my sister, my brother-in-law, and the love I have for the transforming process we pursue here that keeps me going.  But perhaps the most powerful example of courage in my life is that of my wife Ellen.  She faces fear every day, but gets up and keeps going.  It seems to be her love for me, for her children, and even for life itself that gives her courage.  So it seems love IS tied to courage, in a way I might not have imagined.  Love inspires courage to face fear and go on.

But perfect love seems daunting.  If it is “perfect love” that “casts out all fears” I want it.  But how can I ever find perfect love?  Surely not by my own efforts, so I am left once again with fear in parts of my life.  But John once again brings us the “good word” of our loving God when he says, “IF we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.”  So it seems it is not our love, but His love that is perfected in us.  Our task is merely to love one another the best way we can and then He will abide in us, His Spirit perfecting His love within us so all fears will be cast away.  I thank God this morning that we can love because He first loved us (4:19) and because of this we can be people of character.  What is the most courageous thing you have ever done?  Where are you being called to be courageous today?  As you face the fears of your day, of your semester, of your life, focus on loving those around you.  I mean really loving them, and in this way his love will provide you the courage perhaps not to avoid the fear but to go on nevertheless.  Love one another, then be strong and of good courage this day.

Dr. Jim Mannoia